As you may know, we take turns in choosing a venue, so this month it was Pete’s turn to chose a venue and he thought he had come up with somewhere new. Sadly for him both Steve and I had been there before. The look of disappointment on his little face!
The Farmers Table is part of the Tortworth Estate Farm shop where they offer lots of local items at ridiculously inflated prices. It’s a nice venue, just far enough out of Bristol to feel like you’re going out for the day but not so far that its hard to get to, and the countryside is beautiful, with views across Charfield to Wotton under Edge.
We parked in the first car park which is a sort of overflow area as the car park close to the Farm shop and Cafe was busy.
As we approached the building we went left, straight out onto the patio area which was bathed in sunshine. There were several wooden bench seats available though some of them were already taken by customers.
Breakfast MenuLunch Menu
Pete set off into the Cafe to collect some menu’s. When he returned he reported that the man at the counter had been quite rude?
We all chose the Tortworth Breakfast (£9.75) which is the biggest available but by our usual standards, this was a medium, or perhaps, a small breakfast and even Steve (who usually choses the small) was happy with the portion.
With Hard Boiled Egg
However, when the food arrived it was a bit disappointing.
There was a choice of Eggs (Fried, Scrambled or Poached) and we chose two breakfast with Poached eggs and one with a fried Egg but all three were overcooked and hard with the poached eggs resembling hard boiled Eggs.
The Sausage was nicely cooked , a lovely colour and it tasted very good.
The Hash Brown was large and looked delicious but as I’m still on my Low Carb diet, I had to offer it to my chums.
The Toast was piled on top of the Breakfast with the Butter Pats balanced on top of that. They were gently melting from the heat of the food and the sunshine. We had no side plates so it was very difficult to spread the butter on the toast.
The mushrooms were fresh and nicely cooked, there was a portion of Heinz Baked Beans and a slice of Bacon.
With Fried Egg
But this breakfast offering was defined by what it lacked rather than what it contained.
We ordered a portion of Black Pudding but they forgot to add it to my breakfast so Pete went in and reminded them. A rather surly guy eventually delivered it after we had finished eating!
I said it was too late so he took it away without a word and later returned and silently put 60p on the table, I assume as a refund. But as the Black Pudding was £1.40 a portion I’m not sure how they calculated 60 pence was suitable compensation?
The Tea was good if a little dangerous. It was served in a metal Tea pot which was red hot and I Managed to burn my finger whilst I was pouring. But it tasted good.
We had to ask for sweeteners and we were told to collect them ourselves from inside the door of the Cafe, the staff didn’t see it as their job to bring it to our table.
This was a very disappointing experience and Pete was obviously upset that the Farmers Table let us down on so many levels.
But the one thing we have to praise is the view. There cant be many Cafes that offer such a fantastic vista.
It almost made up for the poor service and the miserly portions.
But not quite.
I dont think we will be going back to the Farmers Table any time soon.
I had to take one of Georgias work vans to Lydney in Gloucestershire to get a new panel fitted so Jaki decided to come with me.
It’s not too far away but getting there from our house is a bit awkward as we have to join the motorway at Almondsbury and then navigate the intersection of M4 /M5 at junction 20 which is a bit of a bugger up the back at the best of times, but at peak times, it’s awful.
Even getting from home to the Motorway junction is a nightmare. It seems every road has been dug up. Every route has diversions, single lane traffic, road closures or even worse, temporary traffic lights. It’s like living on Rikers Island.
Then as you head toward the river Severn there are now two bridges to chose from, the old Severn Bridge ( now named the Prince of Wales Bridge, much to the annoyance of the Welsh) and the New Bridge.
Old and new bridges
When I was at junior school they showed us a film ( on an old movie projector) of the design and construction of the old Bridge. It was at the time, a wonder of modern engineering. They also showed us a film of making Cheese but that wasn’t quite as iconic.
The rise and fall of the tide in the Bristol Channel is I believe the second highest in the World, so that made construction even harder.
But sadly it’s design couldn’t cope with the wind that rips up the Bristol Channel and this wonder if engineering had to close to HGV every time there was a breeze.
The old Aust Ferry with the New (old) Bridge in the background.
Years ago there was a Ferry that went across from Aust and my parents took us to see it once. There was a pub there that relied mainly on the ferry passengers for its customers.
It’s a bit complicated getting ontothe right bridge as the motorway for the old bridge goes off to the right whilst the new bridge goes off to the left which is counter intuitive, but we trusted the sat nav and it got us into Chepstow in no time.
The drive takes you up the Welsh side of the Sever to Lydney and eventually to the Forest of Dean. An absolutely beautiful part of the country. Sadly the river Wye is being polluted.
by intensive chicken farms that are allowing their waste to seep into the river. One of the main culprits is an American company called Cargil who have been taken to court for similar abuses in the USA.
We delivered the van and as there was a short wait we wandered into Lydney to find refreshments
We came across Tasty Bites on the junction of the main road through Lydney. It looked a bit run down, with its shop front almost in the road but we could see people inside and smell that Bacon, so we went in.
It was a typical working man’s Cafe. Nothing fancy, very functional. A few tables, a counter and a kitchen. The toilet was out back, down an alley but it was clean and everything worked.
The menu was simple and I immediately noticed a difference in prices to those charged in Bristol, this was much cheaper.
There were already groups of people tucking into their breakfasts.
It looked like plenty of locals were making the most of having this facility on their door step and I herd several people asked if they wanted “the usual” which suggest they eat there regularly.
Low carb breakfast!
I’m still on my low carb diet (3 kilo lost so far) so I built my own breakfast with Eggs, Bacon and Sausage at 75 pence per item, I didn’t waste money on non essentials.
Jaki went for Coffee and a tea cake.
Everything was exactly as we would expect.
Drinks were hot, food was cooked nicely , there’s not much you can say about presentation when it’s this simple .
Service was quick and friendly.
The total bill was less than £8.
I really rate this place for its simplicity, it’s an honest Cafe. We both came away feeling we had good value for money.
Jaki booked us Sunday Lunch in the Anchor over the phone.
I had been gagging for a Roast Beef dinner with all the trimmings since I started my Low Carb diet.
Not that I intended to eat the Potatoes but my plan was to fill myself up with meat and veg.
All weekend I had eaten just the meat and some sparse vegetables but every meal had left me hungry and I really needed to have that ‘full feeling’.
I figured a Sunday Roast would hit the spot perfectly.
Jaki had tried to get us into the Three Horse Shoes a pretty little pub that we had walked past on Saturday, but they were fully booked, so she went for the Anchor which had availability.
The Anchor prides itself on it’s Seafood and they did have quite a selection on the menu and on the ‘special’s board’s’ which were displayed outside the pub and in front of the bar. But Jaki was still stuffed to the gills (see what I did there) with fish from the night before, so she didn’t want to eat anymore. And Fish isnt really my thing.
Years ago when we first started going to Mojacar, we visited a little Chiringuito on the Beach at Vera Playa, for lunch. It was very popular with Spaniards who made up all of the customers on this particular day. The menu was in Spanish though it had lots of pictures so we felt reasonably safe ordering, even though our Spanish was non existent at the time.
Jaki was keen for me to try Paella which I had resisted over the years, but on this occasion I agreed to give it a try.
She ordered what she thought was a ‘mixed seafood Paella’ but when it came it was a huge plate full of cooked fish of all different descriptions, most of which looked bloody awful.
They were I think, boiled not fried (which might have made them a bit more palatable) and it included whole Baby squid, some eels and a bunch of other bony fish with their heads and tails still on.
These days I could probably take this in my stride, but at that time I didn’t eat fish of any description excluding Fish Fingers, so to be presented with a mountain of dead fish was overwhelming.
Georgia, who was only young started to cry, Jaki tried her best to find some thing edible amongst the carnage, whilst I went an attractive shade of Green.
We had actually ordered ‘Frutos del Mar’ for three rather than a Fish Paella.
It transpired that the list of Paella dishes ran out half way down the page and other seafood dishes filled the bottom half of the menu page. So the heading was Paella, but the Paella options ended half way down. We had ordered from a completely different section. It was just that they forgot to separate them when they printed the menu.
My other Fish Nightmare came in a place called ‘Peniscola’ where we ate in a fish restaurant by the harbour.
I ordered Red Mullet which turned out to be three ‘Goldfish’ with the heads and tails left on, the skeleton left in situ, but all the flesh sucked off before they were served.
This dish (suitable for conversion by Jesus himself) was served with nothing else on the plate, no sauce, no Potato and no vegetables. It was in fact a pile of fish bones.
Even Rick Stein would have struggle to eat these.
So, I wasn’t tempted by the over priced Lobster or the Surf and Turf.
It was definitely the Sunday Roast for me.
We had spent the morning sat on the beach at Hive where the sun had eventually come out and the England Batsmen at last got to grips with the Aussie bowlers.
There was one parking space left in the car park at the rear of the Pub which we managed to squeeze into. From the outside the Pub looked quite pleasant so I was disappointed when we got inside and found it to be a bit neglected.
I had imagined it would be a pretty little pub with a cosy bar and a rather attractive (in an olde worlde way) restaurant area full of ships lanterns and sea faring memorabilia. It was in fact a bit run down, slightly down at heel and a bit vacuous.
Our table was in a rather soulless area of the pub between a blocked off front door, another eating area and the toilets.
However, the worst shock was yet to come.
When we looked at the menu’s they had a range of Pub Fare, some interesting Sea food but not a mention of a Sunday Roast.
It seem’s we picked one of the only Pubs in the whole of Dorset that didn’t serve a Sunday lunch.
I was bitterly disappointed as was Jaki but it was too late to get up and leave, we already had drinks and the chances of getting anywhere else to eat seemed slim.
Though when we got back to our hotel later we found they were serving Sunday Lunch until 10pm.
So we made he best of it .
Jaki went for a Meat Pie (£15.95) that looked a lot like a large tan leather brief case with mashed Potato and Peas. The pie was packed with meat and the Mash was creamy, so she was happy with her choice.
I went for an old favourite (£19) Horseshoe Gammon steak (though quite what the horse shoe had to do with it I dont know, I guess its the shape) which came with ‘lightly spiced potato wedges’ (which I left untouched) Pineapple rings, from a tin and a Salad.
The Gammon was tasty, well scorched and tender though the Salad was a complete waste of space.
Limp, soggy lettuce with a few halved tomatoes, this salad was an afterthought and it added nothing.
So we ate up, declined a desert or Coffee and left.
The whole experience was a waste of time and money. £40.05
The pie was a good meal and if it had been priced at £10 it would have deserved praise but at nearly £16, come on.
Pie and Mash, 16 pounds. Really?
The Venue was very disappointing, the seating area had nothing going for it at all.
The food was well cooked, well presented but tinned pineapple and a limp salad, is that really the best they can offer. Why not Peas and an egg?
Even the Soda and Lime was expensive with the soda costing £1.35 (for a half pint) and 75p for the dash of Lime.
My Tomato juice cost me £3.
I guess we should have done our home work before booking and not assumed that all pubs would offer a Sunday Roast, so its our fault we got it so wrong.
The Parlour Cafe and Restaurant.
When we left we decided to back track and visit a place called The Parlour Cafe and Restaurant which was sign posted off the B3157.
We didn’t really know what to expect, I assumed it was a farm shop as it also said on the sign there was fresh Cider for sale.
So we were pleasantly surprised when we turned into Bredy Farm gate and saw the restaurant area lit with fairy lights and full of people.
We parked the car overlooking the beautiful Dorset countryside and were tempted to sit there and listen to the last over’s of the cricket, but the appeal of the Cafe got the better of us.
As we walked across the car park, past an overgrown herb garden and some old Poly tunnels surrounded by agricultural memorabilia we approached some large wooden doors, beyond which we could see a courtyard with outdoor seating.
This area was partly over grown by vines which offered welcomed shade from the Sun which was now fiercely hot.
People were sat on the wooden benches drinking Cider and listening to the music from speakers fixed to the walls of the surrounding buildings whilst their dogs introduced themselves to each other.
We followed the ‘Entrance’ sign and found ourselves inside what used to be a Barn where a bar had been built at one end and a stage at the other. In between were some long bench tables where a group of young people were drinking.
Through the barn there was yet another area which was an indoor eating area. It was full with people eating and drinking like some medieval banquet.
To our left, screened off by a shoulder high partition was the kitchen where staff were working in the searing heat, turning out some of the most delicious Sunday Lunches I have seen for ages, each plate was piled with veg, then thick slices of Meat were balance on the top and drenched in gravy.
In another corner was a Pizza oven and many of the younger customers were eating delicious looking Pizza washed down with Beer or Cider.
This was a whole new ball game. The atmosphere was buzzing, the venue was eclectic, exciting, very rustic but comfortable and it had an identity which went with the food.
Oh how I wish we had found that place before wasting our money at the Anchor.
Back at the car the cricket was in its dying stages so we sat and listened as the England Batsmen salvage a victory and kept the Ashes alive.
Back at the Hotel we slept for an hour and then realised we had a whole evening to fill without anything much to do.
We had already eaten. We could go out for a drink but a lot of the local Pubs had shut down at that time on a Sunday and besides, I was still struggling to swallow more than a couple of halves. My Drinking days seem to be numbered?
I felt very much like we had over stayed our welcome and it might have been better to have set out for home on the evening rather than have to hang around till the morning when we would be forced to eat yet another Hotel Breakfast.
So we wandered up the high street and had a drink in an almost deserted pub (by now only the die hard piss-heads were still drinking) before deciding it was probably jus as good sat in the bar in our Hotel.
Which it actually wasn’t, there was a sort of hang over atmosphere there too.
The staff seemed a bit grumpy, and the customers too were somewhat touchy.
Whilst we were supping our last drink I suddenly had an overwhelming urge to eat.
The weekends restrictions had caught up with me and I decided to head down to the Chinese take away to get some food.
I ordered a Chicken Chow Mein with a tub of Curry Sauce and took it back to our room where Jaki ate half, despite saying she didn’t want anything more to eat.
Washed down with a cup of Tea, this was undoubtedly the best meal I had eaten all week end.
And the Cheapest!
Though I doubt it did much for my Carbohydrate intake it sure made me feel better!
We passed the Olive Tree on Friday night when we were looking for somewhere to eat and liked the look of the Menu.
It was very busy with every table taken, even the tables outside had people eating and drinking so we knew it was popular and thought it might be difficult getting a booking on a Saturday evening. However, when we called in late on Saturday afternoon they said they could seat us at 7.45pm which is a bit later than we would have wished for but as we were on a break and didn’t have anything else to do, we accepted.
Originally we had tried to book Dorshi, a small restaurant in an alley beside the Hotel which offered some interesting Asian dishes, but they were fully booked.
As the Olive Tree was only across the road from the Hotel we didn’t have far to go so found ourselves ready way too early. So we stopped in the front bar of the Hotel where the doors swing back the full width of the bar so it is open to the high street, and we had a drink.
When we arrived at the Olive tree I was surprised to find it only half full (or half empty on a bad day. There were several empty tables and we were told we could chose where we sat.
We initially chose a table in the middle of the restaurant but I was sat with my back to the door, which they kept open, and there was an unpleasant draft. Luckily a group of four left a bigger table deeper into the room so we moved there.
Menus were provided and a list of the specials was read out.
They had a good selection of fresh fish as well as some rather nice meat dishes.
Jaki spent a good deal of time looking at the wine list and eventually chose a glass of Red for me (I dont like full bodied Reds) and a glass for herself. It’s amazing how the taste of wine changes as soon as you start eating food. The glass Jaki chose for me tasted unpleasant until I tried it with the Pork, but I’m a bit of a Heathen when it comes to wine.
If I’m honest, I dont like any of it much.
Then we tackled the menu.
Eventually Jaki was tempted by the ‘Spectacular’ which was like a fish version of a mixed grill.
Mussels and Shellfish cooked in a white wine sauce with a dash of cream. Topped off with pieces of prime fish and served with Crusty bread, this really was a fish lovers dream.
No wonder the Guardian named this ‘one of the best fish restaurants in Dorset’.
It was beautifully cooked and presented and she enjoyed every mouthful, though by the end she was struggling to finish, it was a big portion.
I chose the Slow cooked free range Pork Belly rubbed with Garlic and North African spices, served with Apple and Mango salsa, which was delicious. I usually tend to stay away from belly pork, it was a regular feature on the menu at Southmead Fire-station when I first went there and it was always swimming in fat.
This dish was a million miles away from that cheap offering, it was dry, almost fat free and tasted great with the spicy finish. There were some Herb Sautéed chunky potatoes too which I left.
As a treat I ordered a Cheese board which we shared with a glass of Port each and this was a great way to end the meal.
Staff were helpful, attentive and friendly without becoming a nuisance.
The service was good, the venue comfortable and relaxing though the draft from the door was annoying. There was generally a nice atmosphere.
Whilst we were eating several more groups arrived and sat at various tables so there was a gentle ‘hubbub of sound’ which added to the ambiance.
We did notice meals being taken out through a back door so either the staff were eating or there was another area of the premise that we couldn’t see.
The Kitchen was ‘open plan’ so we could watch the staff preparing, cooking and plating the meals, an interesting option and one that seems to be becoming more popular.
At £86 including drinks, port and the cheese board I didn’t think this was too expensive. Everything was spot on so I dont mind paying a bit extra to get it right.
We left a £5 tip which isnt 10% I know but in the current climate we all have to watch the pennies, even us famous restaurant critics.
We booked to stay at the Bull for the weekend to celebrate Jaki’s Birthday without actually knowing we had booked breakfast as well as the room.
If I’m honest, I would have preferred to go out and find a breakfast each day rather than troop down to the dining room at the same time each morning, sit at the same table, stare at the same people and eat from the same menu.
It’s a bit Billy Butlin.
Years ago when I was small, my Nan and Grandad (Mary and Bill) who I loved to bits, took me and my Brother Tony on holiday to Butlin’s Pwillheli. I think it might have been around the time my Mum was giving birth to my brother Andy, but I cant be sure.
I do remember catching several steam trains to get there and on one connection we saw our first Diesel train, which we found very exciting at the time.
We stayed in a Challet and had three meals a day provided in the canteen where they actually shouted.
“Umpah, Umpah stick it up your Jumper” over the loud speaker just before they served the soup, which I remember as being a browny-green colour.
We had a fantastic holiday, loved every minute of it but it was the start of my aversion to seaside holidays in the UK, which always consisted of long journeys in old cars that broke down. Sharing beds with other family members, My Mum and Dad arguing, usually about the cost of the vacation. Long wet days walking round seaside resorts trying to find some thing to do and the inevitable journey home, mid week because we all decided to cut the holiday short.
I try to avoid anything that remotely reminds me of those times, which are bitter sweet.
We went to Gran Canaria once, Georgia, Jaki and I and stayed in a 5 start all inclusive resort.
We hated it.
So, hotels with B & B or evening meals are usually a ‘No No’ for us.
But on this trip I didnt realise we were booking food. It was our own fault, we left it a bit late to book accomodation and by the time we did, most of the good places were gone.
It only took a short while.
Jakis chose Bridport on the evening, the next morning I looked at available accommodation and there were some great places for rent, particularly on Air B & B but by the time we sat down to book, later that evening, most of the places had gone.
The only reasonable venue left was the Bull Hotel, (£579.15) so we took it for three nights starting on the Friday, which meant we had our first breakfast booked for Saturday morning.
Day one:
The dining room had been converted to accommodate a multiplicity of old tables crammed into every suitable space to accommodate guests who were given a choice of time slots between 0800-1000 hrs but as is often the case, we all seemed to converge on the dining room at the same time.
Our little table, was particularly bijou and we struggled to get all the necessary items on the surface at once.
The menu looked reasonably diverse yet still offered all the basics. It was in two parts (three if you include the Kids Menu) with a help yourself section that the server described as being ‘Full of Yummy things’ and the main even which included the Full English.
The Yummy things were set out on a long table but they were exposed to the elements so anyone could sneeze on them or dribble into the Yoghurt without any restrictions, which isn’t very inviting. Im sure when they were first laid out it looked appealing but by the time several families with young children had picked over the Croissants and upended the Danish Pastries, the aesthetics were lost and the whole thing looked like the proverbial Bun Fight.
Jaki did try a slice of fresh pine apple but we made sure it came from the bottom of the pile, thus adding to the abstract nature of the display.
Obviously on the first morning I was in for the Full English but I had to avoid the toast (White or Granary) and the Hash Browns (though I mistook mine for stewed Apple) but there was still plenty to chose from.
When it arrived I was a bit disappointed by the presentation.
The Bacon, the best and most desirable element of any breakfast, wasn’t a few rashers of Back Bacon but a few dried up rashers of streaky. Now I’m not unhappy with streaky Bacon. Im not unhappy with Crispy Bacon, but I do object to dried out Bacon that has been cooked and kept hot for a long time.
The Sausage, which is number two on my favourite breakfast item list, was anaemic without a scorch mark or a burn on it anywhere.
Ideally my sausage would have been cooked on a griddle and be striped with some good deep burns. This had the skin colour of a Scotsman in Benidorm. It just didn’t look right.
The taste was Ok and had it been cooked better it would have been a great sausage, but it wasn’t.
Then things start to go down hill.
The Eggs (I chose fried) on this occasion were over done so the yolk was hard.
The Black Pudding on the other hand hadn’t been cooked at all, which is a shame because black pudding fried so the edges go crispy, is a delight. This had the consistency of a pudding or a cake, it was still crumbly.
The single mushroom head was pleasant enough though it was black, as if it had been cooked in Ink.
A half Tomato and a small pot of Baked beans completed the agenda.
The Hash Browns were a bit of a mystery. I honestly mistook them for stewed Apple which I assumed was a clever accompaniment for the black pudding.
Brown sauce was served in a small pot on request.
Jaki on the other hand chose Smoked salmon and Scrambled Eggs and hers was delicious. The smoked Salmon in particular was really good and it was a big portion too.
She asked for Coffee whilst I had a pot of Tea but by now we had almost no space left on the table and it became a chess game, picking up one item and moving it in order to access another which meant inevitably some thing would end up on the floor.
I find this clutter a bit stressful. If your gonna sit at a table and enjoy your food you dont want a pile of debris all around you.
Day Two:
Determined not to make the same mistake twice, I had decided to order the smoked Salmon rather than the Full English and to insist on a bigger table.
I failed on both counts.
We were shown to the same table we sat at yesterday and I changed my mind at the last second and ordered what I thought was Ham and Eggs but turned out to be two thin slivers of ham, sat on half a Muffin, drenched in a horrible yellow sauce. (Hollandaise).
‘Black Cab’ Ham and slow cooked Poached eggs with an English Muffin and Hollandaise sauce wasnt quite what I expected.
The Eggs at least were familiar, they were over cooked and hard but the tiny little slivers of ham were overwhelmed by the thick rich taste of the sauce which soaked the Muffins and made them soggy.
This was horrible and probably one of the worst breakfasts I’ve had for a while.
Jaki chose Smashed avocado’s, heritage Tomatoes, Chilli (though where this was hiding I dont know) and slow cooked Lycroft Farm eggs which were also done like bullets. Do Lycroft Farms know what is being done to their produce?
To add insult to Injury they served us up our Tea in a Pot that had a huge chip out of it. My curiosity was piqued an I noticed that a lot of the crockery, jugs and pots all had lumps out of them like shrapnel wounds.
Day Three:
We both decided on the Full English. I suspect it was a last Hurrah, before we headed home.
I had hoped it would be an improvement on day one but if anything, it was slightly worse though we did sit at a different table. It was still the same dimensions.
We weren’t asked what type of eggs we wanted, a choice I was given on the first day and we weren’t asked what toast we wanted, though I wasn’t eating toast anyway, it was none the less a slip in standards.
Tea was brought in yet another chipped Tea pot and the jug of milk was salvaged from the vacant table next to us.
There was then an extremely long wait for the food to arrive which was exacerbated when the people next to us got served before us even though they came in later.
When our food arrived we were told the baked beans would be with us later as some one ( the Chef?) forgot them.
There was no improvement in the food. The Bacon was worse if anything, drier and so crisp by now it had no taste. The Sausage was still as pasty as the day the skin was filled.
There were two disks of Hash Brown potatoes but as a high carb item I left them alone.
Wilted Flower
Strangely the mushroom tasted very bitter and it was a bit unpleasant. The black pudding was still undercooked so I left that and the half tomato added nothing to the overall meal so I left that also.
The Only soft Egg and they broke it!
It seems that after three days, six different meals and 5 different choices the best meal was the Smoked Salmon and Scrambled eggs.
Whilst we were out and about we saw several cooked breakfast that knocked this selection into a Cocked Hat. Which is a shame cause Fullers Brewery should be able to deliver better than this!
We called in to The Tortilla Canteen early on a Friday evening as we were getting peckish having been wandering round Town sampling the local hostelries.
I was still on my Low Carb diet, so it was a bit tricky to find some where that offered some thing interesting without chips, Rice or Pasta, yet still made Jaki feel like she was having a birthday meal.
We hoped a Mexican would do the trick and I guess it did.
From outside it looked very small but there were a few people sat at tables on the pavement drinking Mexican beer and putting away a few Tequila shots which was a good sign.
Inside there weren’t many guests so getting a table wasn’t a problem.
We were shown to a small booth with hard wooden bench seats backed with sacking built around a pine table. It all looked a bit ‘home made’ but there didn’t seem to be a Mexican Theme with Pictures of ET on the walls, It sort of mixed its identity some what.
A previous visitor?
We went to Tijuana once and ate in a Brothel. Our friends, who we were traveling with at the time sent their food back. Apparently the Kitchen didn’t know how to make Chilli properly!
We were sat right opposite the small bar where the staff were mixing Marguerite Cocktails, so we could overhear their conversation.
It seems they were catering at a Music Festival some where and most of the staff had been sent off there, so they were short of staff.
(Most places we visited were in the same boat and it’s been a recurring theme since Brexit).
The young Lady waiting tables brought us each a menu but before we had time to look, she was back asking if we were ‘ready to order’.
She obviously modelled herself on that famous Mexican, ‘Speedy Gonzales”.
Jaki usually takes an age to make a meal choice ( average wait 45 minutes) so on her Birthday, I expected it to take even longer.
She has her Mothers DNA when it comes to making a decision.
The menu was fairly limited but it had enough options to satisfy us and we both went for the Quesadillas .
I chose Chicken (£16.75) and Jaki the beef.(£18.75).
These 12 inch flour tortillas were folded into quarters and served with some sort of red pickle and a dipping sauce.
We also chose a side of Black Beans (£4.50).
The meal in itself was a bit ordinary despite the high praise the owner heaped on himself. Apparently he knew all about Mexican food. It seemed he had travelled to every corner of the earth spending at least 5 years in each venue learning everything there was to know about the cuisine before opening a restaurant in London.
Put that in your CV and smoke, it Jamie Oliver.
My Chicken Quesadilla filling was a bit ‘sloppy’ it was more like shredded chicken in a (mild) sauce but Jaki seemed quite happy with hers. It was quite filling if a little, ordinary.
Now having read reviews on Trip Advisor it seems lots of people praised the Tortilla Canteen for its ‘Mild flavours’.
But I just dont get it.
If you want mild flavours go order a Cream Tea!
What Little I know about Mexico suggests they dont do Mild.
Their Music, their Culture, their Drinks and yes their Food, is anything but Mild.
On the day we visited Mexico, we witnessed a shooting, drank some scanky Tequila including a worm and ate in a brothel (did I tell you that already)?
Jaki refused to allow me to chose my own desert that day.
But in my meal there was, as far as I could see, no evidence of a Chilli or a Jalapeño pepper either inside the wrap or on the plate.
We weren’t even offered any additional sauces which meant my meal lacked any punch and it had very little flavour.
I had expected, though perhaps naively, that the Quesadilla would come with a few bits and pieces like refried beans or Guacamole, but it didn’t.
The only way to get these things was to order them as extras and they weren’t cheap.
Jaki had two margarita cocktails (£19) and I had a Ginger Beer which was the hottest thing I consumed that evening (£3).
We finished our meals and chose not to order anything else, so we asked for the bill.
The total Bill came to £66 with Jaki’s drinks costing more than her meal.
It was only after we had left that I checked the bill and realised they had wrongly charged for black beans with chorizo which added another £3.50 to the bill.
I called in the following day and brought this to their attention and they were happy to refund the difference though they mischievously took the money out of the jar with Staff Tips in it.
So it seems the staff actually paid for this mistake.
In summary this version of Mexican street food was pleasant enough though in my humble opinion lacked the bite I had expected.However, I recognise this might suit some people.
I thought the food was rather expensive for what it was and the drinks were particularly pricey. I did though compare them to other venues in Bridport and they were comparable, so maybe that’s an unreasonable criticism on my part?
The venue isn’t very comfortable, I wouldn’t want to sit at this table for very long and I’m not sure it has a very clear identity.
I should have looked at the price before ordering, so complaining after the event is pointless.
My bad .
The following day I discovered a van selling Mexican food in the Street Market and the prices were much more reasonable and the environment, far more comfortable, if slightly wetter.
Ive been following this guy on instagram for a while and he explores eating venues in Bristol, some of which look really good. I dont intend to share every one of his posts but i thought i would bring the link to your attention and if interested, you could follow too.
In my search for a low carb diet I paid a visit to Konbini a local Asia store where I was certain I could source some Shirataki Noodles.
These particularly low carb , low calorie, gluten free noodles are made from Konjac Yam (or Elephant Yam). Commonly grown throughout Asia, the root or Corm is used to make noodles and rice. It contains ‘glucomannan’ a water soluble dietary fibre.
Shirataki noodles are so low in carbs (the net carbs per serving is zero) so they are gaining in popularity through diets like the Keto diet.
But despite having hundreds and hundreds of different types of Noodle, they didn’t have any Shirataki noodles. I asked the lady in the shop and showed her the article on line. However, she was puzzled and didn’t recognise this product, so she called her colleague who then called her colleague and the four of us wandered around the shop in a procession analysing every packet of noodles we could find.
In the end we conceded defeat, so I bought a packet of Soya noodles as a token effort which were at least fairly low Carb.
When I got home, Jaki and I took out packets of noodles from our cupboards and compared the contents and the values, as advertised on the packaging. What was surprising was the variation and the range of different values (Calories, Carbs, Sugar )supposedly similar looking noodles contained.
Now I know most people dont get all ‘Geeky’ about noodles. Like most, I would have been hard pressed to know the difference between Chinese Yam Noodles, Hot Pot Vermicelli Noodles and Italian Spaghetti. In fact, I didn’t know there were so many different types of noodles available.
A sample of the noodles available
But now I’ve been introduced to a whole new world of noodles and I’m gonna try a few.
This morning I had arranged to drive into Bristol and meet up with my old mate Raf, I hadn’t seen him since before we set off for Spain earlier in the year. Since then, he has been back to Mauritius for a 5 week holiday, to see his family, attend two weddings and check up on his house on Flic en Flac beach.
My plan was to call into the large Chinese supermarket at the bottom of Muller Rd (behind IKEA) and buy some Shirataki noodles there. They had two different types on their web site.
So I picked Raf up from a very wet Ashley Down and headed down Ashley Hill to the store WaiYee Hong and snapped up a couple of packs, one for me and one for Frazer, who is responsible for this latest Fad.
This huge supermarket is underneath a similarly sized Chinese restaurant and used to be called ‘Water Sky Restaurant’ which offered an all you could eat Chinese buffet. That is, if they could be bothered to serve you.
We went once but after an hour and a half we had only been served two lots of food and when we complained the staff were quite rude, so we walked out and refused to pay. They obviously didn’t like that and threatened to call the Police, but we stood our ground, gave them a name and address and told them to sue us if they weren’t happy. We never heard anything after that.
Yet again we couldn’t find the Noodles, even with the help of one of the staff. I was beginning to give up hope. However, when I asked at customer services the lady there identified them and although they were sold under a different name, she assured me they were the same product.
So at last, I had the elusive noodles in my grasp and at £1.50 a pack I was quite pleased with myself.
By this time we needed to eat, so we stopped in Mina Rd where there is a Cafe which I have had my eye on for ages and Raf was happy to give it a try.
We managed to find a parking space close to the Cafe which was lucky as it was raining quite heavily. Parking in this part of Bristol is difficult and the streets are very narrow which can be a bit off putting.
We had a quick wander along the rank of shops just to familiarise ourselves before going in to Liyas Cafe.
It was rather quirky in there with limited space and the seating areas were small and in short supply, but we found a table and grabbed a couple of menu’s.
The food options were interesting and hit the spot a treat. Lots of fresh salads and veggie options all with a spicy twist.
My attention was immediately grabbed by the large Samosas (£2) on the counter and I couldn’t resist having one with my Mug of Tea. The Samosa and the Tea both tasted great and kept me going whilst we chose our main dishes.
In the end we both went for a salad.£7.85.
I chose the Pakora whilst Raf went for the Chicken. With hind sight I wish I had chosen the Chicken too, not because mine wasn’t delicious but because i think Pakora is probably higher carb than Chicken?
chickenPakora
When they came they looked great, an interesting selection of items with a zingy dressing on a funky oval plate, it was both tasty and filling, and not a chip or a slice of bread in sight.
There was a lady behind the counter who I assumed was Liya herself and she served, prepared the food and took the money. This place is obviously popular judging by the amount of customers that came in whilst we were there and they did a roaring take away trade.
Cutlery was a bit grubby and I didn’t look too closely at the sugar bowl but I have seen much worse.
I asked to use the toilet which had an ‘Out of Order’ sign on the door but it was in service and although a little cramped, it was perfectly clean and hygienic.
When we finished eating we ordered another round of tea’s (£4) to wash it all down before venturing back out into the rain where the street people were trying to take shelter but were getting soaked.
Inner city Bristol never looks quite so appealing when its raining but this area of Bristol is well worth exploring further with a trip to the Farm house ( A pub in the City Farm ) high on my agenda.
In search of a great Breakfast 